Open letter to British mystery writers

(and mystery writers generally, but mainly those brits)

Come on. One of you must be bored to tears rereading all the old Christie, Marsh, Sayers, and Cauldwell too. Please sit yourself down and write something new. And good. It must be good.

I'm going mad. Not even Wodehouse is doing it for me. I need something that is BOTH a comedy of manners and a good, solid mystery. And none of this gory, twisted, how-sick-can-we-make-the-killer crap that has been coming out of late. It's far worse over here, but you all are guilty too. (Yes PD James, I am talking to you!) I've been reduced to combing through my paperbacks to find plots I can only vaguely remember, because there is simply no fun in reading a mystery novel that you know through and through (with the exception of a couple of Dame Agatha's classics, but that would be TWO books, and I can't read them even one more time - it just won't work anymore). I donated almost all of my books to Books for Prisoners, thinking I needed to pass the joy along, not knowing my well would run dry!

Give me my little vice, my little substitute-for-daytime TV (I guess that's what it would be, I don't really know how the daytime TV thing works, but it seems comparable). I sometimes need a little escape during naptime or in the middle of the night when I can't sleep due to baby-in-belly going wild.

But please, I like it saucy and smart. Give me Peter Wimsey and Harriet Vane, give me Hilary Tamar, give me Miss Jane Marple! If you don't I will have no choice but to take more naps or watch trashy TV, and these prospects alone make me feel dumber.